Sunday, December 30, 2012


There must have been something wrong with my eyes. I've been so careless lately. It is very obvious.

I went to Senayan City for event reporting. After that I went shopping, I found this top and shoes quite nice. I like them. But sadly for the shoes, the size was too big for me. I need 37. I asked the shopkeeper to find in which store the particular design in  size 37 might be available. She came to me and said that only one couple left in Grand Indonesia. So, I got there the next two day, hoping they hadn't been bought yet. And there they were. I'm lucky! At least, I thought so.

At home, I showed it to my mom, saying I got another sweet shoes and I planned to wear it for work. She said, "It's ballet shoes, you can't wear that!"

"No," I said. "It only seems so."

But then, I tried to put them on my feet and took them off. A few seconds later, I saw a sticker on the sole. Whoops! My mom's right...

Not gonna wear these to work! NEVER!

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Friday, December 28, 2012

Graduate Euphoria!

To be honest, I still can't believe that now I'm graduated already. I wanna share some pics on what I passed through days before the graduation day, out of re-fitting my 'kebaya'. I did hang out with my girls, dog tag awarding... It was awesome!

Dinda, Fika, Me, and Brenda
My 'dog tag' :)

Remember that I went to Times Bookstore and bought a book. It's IQ84. Finally!

The make up left on my face when I got home. What do you think?

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Sunday, December 9, 2012

No Drama - Talking to Myself

I took a pic of myself. Self-photoshoot with my cellphone cam. I looked at the result---Me, lying down on my bed, smiling to the lens. Is it me? I did ask myself while my laptop played Colbie Caillat's song, 'Little Things'. A question and a statement quarrel at each other in my head. Is it me? Is it someone else?

The little things, you do to me are---taking me over...

Some space in my heart I let empty. Sad face just simply pictured myself from the outside. It's somewhat my unconscious mind talking my expression. Smile-less.

...everything inside of me...

Reality of this made me looked at myself more deeply. I left people and their lives. Breaking our connections. Something changed in me. Turning into someone I never wanna be. I put away people. I put away their drama. A decision is made---to avoid almost all of the causes my distractions.

...(don't) you mess up mess up...

My works consumed me a lot. Too much! Yes? Trying to fix things I don't need, just for it. This is not me. Not my way living the life, playing with fate. No lead.

...I don't wanna lose you...

Different is my definition. That's my truth. I'm trying to get back to myself. My real self.

...Give up give up...

You were right. Getting to know who I am is like taking route through the labyrinth. Please help me back and not misguide me...or else...

...just leave---me---hanging on...

I want to go straight away. Straightening my mind. Straightening my way. I will hang on and fight! Looking back and get back, conquer the game I might have escaped from. speakin' your mind and sayin' the real thing...

Everyone is so far away. Disappearing in silence. In seconds. I can't talk to nobody?!

...feeling lonely but...

I can't really speak out. Something has changed me... I have changed. The reality shapes me this kind of person I'm seeing in the picture I just took. My fault: I let them get me caught.

...wake up wake up this ain't just a thing about you...

Hopefully so... I'm going away. Leaving the drama behind. Be the silence. Be the watcher. Be the runaway. Be the free.

Colbie Caillat - The Little Things

...what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Friday, December 7, 2012

Graduation Day---the End of College Life Stories

It's almost 3pm, I 'escaped' from my office to meet my lecturer who's been guiding my undergraduate studies thesis in a mall across the street. Somehow, I ended up taking a cab rushing into traffic jam of Thamrin-Senayan after getting a phone call from him, asking me to meet him in another mall where I (once again) ended up running, chasing him from the south entrance of Senayan City to the Main Gate! Yes, it's officially signed! I'm graduated...

Days before that... I was worried. Yet, I had tried the graduation coat, paid the administration fee for graduation day, sent the petite notes as my final farewell message for the yearbook (including the photo)... Yes everything needed to be graduated. I's a huge step and it had been something that made me smile meanwhile and hoped the whole procedure went quickly. Now it's answered.

So... School? Been there, done that!

Yeah... Dec, 5th 2012 it is. It kept me alive. Maybe I treated the moment just like other girl's planning their wedding or something. TOO MUCH! Yes... I took it seriously. Even I made statuses like on Facebook, Blackberry Messenger and Gmail. Of course, Twitter included (if I'm not mistaken). Those statuses were counting down the days. One of it was...this:

-2 Day: Trying out my old 'Kebaya'
Wearing 'kebaya'---the national costume---is a must for the female graduates in Indonesia. While the lucky boys can only wear suit, white shirt with tie and trousers. Hate them! What's worse? I got to style my hair the old-fashioned way, too! 

I woke up at 4.30am for the make up and hair do. I don't really enjoy the result. For me, it's too much. The hair do should be low big hair bun. It killed me. But I guess I survived no matter what. Yet, it makes the day, the big day of my life, just went away like that. As if it was nothing mattered to me.

I wore my old 'kebaya'. My mom and I bought it four years ago for my high school graduation. My batch was the first one who celebrated high school graduation with that annoying costume. I never like it. I see there are many cool kebaya made by local designers, but no one able to make it felt nice to wear. The fabric is the problem. Kinda itchy, and heavy. There must always be much embellishment attached. Sick, isn't it? What a torture... 

That's why I never want to buy a new one. I decided to just re-wear it. There will be no other occasion where I would like to wear it. Ha! Anyway, I'm quite thankful for the so-called 'Harry Potter' costume which covered it. Hihi... 

The graduation took place at Ritz Carlton Ballroom, Pacific Place. Started at 9AM! Woo-hoo... I couldn't just sit and sleep during the 3-hour-ceremony, as I sat on the 2nd row. Fantastic! 

Another photo with Maria the owner of the second and this photo.
This photo shows better of the place where we finally graduated. Taken after the ceremony has been over and before we proceeded to lunch buffet at the foyer.

Somehow, I prefer the graduation of American universities way. More simple, intimate, and down-to-earth. Not that I'm not thankful of those pretty chandeliers hanging above my head, shining my day. But, the ceremony of my uni was... too dramatic. Well, Indo people are so great in creating dramatic situation. They are the specialist. Sinead O'Connor might say 'Nothing Compares'.

Yes, I don't understand why the uni intended the celebration for our parents, the teary moment and all. For what? OMG, it's graduation... and it should OUR celebration of being for 4 years there, stuDYING to get GPA above 3,00 and that we are finally able to put those scenes into a wonderful and memorable liberating end. Maybe I'm just different from anyone else... (as always).

After I finished, I went down to the ground level as the ballroom is in a shopping building and they got Books and Beyond bookstores! Hmm.. before that I took pics with big stuffed bears at the atrium. They're such cute xmas decor buddies! Later on, still with my Harry Potter coat and graduation hat, I bought a book, while my mom and my sister went to a bread store nearby. As you might guess, everyone was looking at me seriously and some weren't really shocked coz maybe they already knew and saw many newly-graduates wearing such costume, walking around Pacific Place that day. 

One thing funny was... I was at the cashier, paying my books. The shopkeeper asked, "You've just been graduated, today?" I laughed lightly and replied in brief, "yeah, just now, at the ballroom." She, then, said more, "Ohh, well, congratulations, then!" Somehow, it's stranger says and still the positive power I could feel it. That made my day even more wonderful. Although, I was a little disappointed that I couldn't take pics with my lecturers. Couldn't find them and some of them didn't come. But I could still keep in touch with them, right?

In this opportunity, anyway, anyhow...

I would like to give many big thanks to my mom. And then my whole family for supporting me with the education I got. For my thesis advisor, my fave lecturers whose names I couldn't mention here for their privacy matters. Also for my friends, who helped me going through all this process and progress, for being good friends, for lending the books, giving out ideas, etc. Thank you! I will remember it...because to me, it's a bunch of blessings.

...and please keep on supporting me! I want to get a scholarship for my Master Degree. Wish me luck! The journey to get smart isn't over ^^

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Tuesday, November 20, 2012

L'Oreal Professionnel at JFW2013

You've probably heard already that JFW2013 in Plaza Senayan was kinda having a ... disaster, you might call it so. Ahh yeap, the so-called 'fashionable' outdoor tent broke down due to the heavy rain, with storm scene included. Anyway, I didn't attend the whole shows in Fashion Tent like I did last year. Thankfully and regrettably! I got sick around these weeks, so I didn't have lots of photos to share. Here are some from L'Oreal Professionnel show. Before it was planned to show in the tent, but due to the weak condition of it, the show was moved then to the atrium. Well, not bad, but poor spot to take pics. 

It's actually a hairshow, ended by fashion parade. LP introduced three new hair styles, inspired by  Brigitte Bardot, Twiggy and Elizabeth Taylor in a series they called Retro Nouveau. As for the dresses, they were designed by Soko Wiyanto, Hian Tjen and Yogi Pratama. S'il vous plait!


(Please do not take the pics and reuse or post them without any permissions, they belong to me. I give my faith, don't abuse it *wink*).

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Saturday, November 10, 2012

You Know You're Hectic at Work When...


Yes, I love post-it(s)! *sigh*

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Sunday, November 4, 2012

A Rush of Blood to the Heart

A sword of fear has also gotten me dead. All the strength I'd been gathered inside me, almost broke down. Almost... over!

...but I don't want it over yet!


It all started by how the my heart kept beating so hard. It happened countless times that I ran out of air and found it difficult to breathe easily. Maybe, I've been a heavy passive smoker.

Whenever it happened. I got scared, something would happen. Something I can't avoid, I can't change...worst, I can't fix. How is that? On the other life I'm living, I'm stuck in boredom. Writer's block for days. Mistakes at work. Trouble maker at home. That could be the moment where I forgot that "life throws curve ball at you, and you go where it takes you." Simply, according to Master Shifu, I don't find my inner peace. Well, once I did. But I left it away.

Then... Something has fucked me over. It turned my life upside down. BUT, it put me back, miraculously. 


Then, the real thing happened through some random incidents. The filmfest was going well, although there was some chaos, due to threats. Anyway who cares about moron's threats? So we kept on going. Yet, what those days made it perfect for me? I got the call that the schedule for thesis defense was on 4th September!

My reaction was...'yaay, finally, they called me' and 'oh God, Blaire will be launched on the 3rd, while the filmfest will be going on, I can't come anyway...and I got to take a leave'. So, yes, there were mixed feelings. Yet, I passed all of those events in the week. Only... one of them wasn't really going that well.

...they postponed me... Yes, there's a condition in my university, where the hearing if you pass or postponed. I never knew until it happened to me.

THIS IS WHAT HAPPENED: The professor who judged my thesis didn't like my English.

Oh, so simple reason! He insisted that I needed to rewrite my thesis in Indonesian, during the revision phase for 2-week-time. Did I cry? Yes, I didn't think that could happen that far. How could I finish it in two weeks? Together with deadlines at work, filmfest and new work at boutique.  I also wonder why people who did their these just like that could pass easily. And why was I judged by the super panelists, and one of them even got a profile page at wikipedia(dot)com?!

Strangely, I already received a hunch.

Getting close to the D-day, I kept on entertaining myself that it's going to be ok. But, it wasn't. I was completely disappointed. Like a punch to my face. Reality bites, huh?

Me and Dinda's Smurf.
Post-crying scene after thesis defense.
Something has fucked me over, and now I'm ready to fight back.

I cried the whole way back to home and also tried to stop at the same time. I didn't want to be seen crying in front of my mom. Coz I knew she could cry too if so. All I did was trying as if it's something that usually happens and everything is going to be ok.

The next's like the sleep and the nightdream has taken away my pain. The burden has gone.  Something has fucked me over... and now I'm so fighting...and being back alive! It saves me from the stagnant mind... my humdrum phase.

In a disappointment, something slit your heart. The blood rushes out, you lose yourself in tears of pain and darkness. But remember the flow, that it would bring them rushing back to its rightful place. Yet, it takes you to cover the wound and to keep walking, to make it stay there... working to keep you alive.

Just cover it and keep on walking, as nothing ever happened before. There could be many other things at the other part of your way that heal you.

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Sunday, September 23, 2012

Work and The Latest Portfolio

And yes, before I have written here that I resigned from le Mariage magazine. So far, during my jobless days, I sent CVs to some prominent media in town. They all accepted me. Thank Lord! Yaaay! Some offered me nice salary, but they didn’t have flexible working time. I couldn’t take it of course, as I was still working on my final project to graduate. Till now, I haven’t got the call for my thesis defense of my Bachelor Degree...of which I’m worried about so much right now.

But anyway, yes, I have finished writing the thesis and had nothing else to do except work and some volunteer activity to a non-profit organization (wink). I got the time to have a full time job since last July, after I submitted the paper work on 27th July. The deadline! Fortunately, I have accepted to a company nearby, then when it’s done, I go straight to work the next Monday on 30th July!


Anyway, anyhow...
When I had this jobless moment, only me and my thesis... I still got the chance to be Le Mariage’s contributor for feature article on travel. It’s Maldives, baby! Another paradise on earth... Not only one article, but my photos were also published on their Runway Ideas pages. I’m happy and proud that the magazine is getting thicker this year and received so many positive feedbacks from readers and clients. Hopefully, it could be one of the coolest wedding magazine in the country.
So here it is... *I’m so thrilled*

Maldives - Le Mariage July-September 2012 - by Bree

The Runway Photos!

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Thursday, June 28, 2012

I Just Love the Details, Really!

I hate weddings, but I love the details...

Anything reminds you of Marchesa and Elie Saab by the way?

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Monday, June 25, 2012

Things that Fix My Mood Lately

MC Indo June edition puts me on their contributor list. Yay! It's kinda weird that I was featured there as 'photographer'. I really am a photographer, yet still a newbie. Mostly I was featured as 'writer' or 'journalist'. Anyway, I'm happy of what I have done so far in life.

If you see the title, it has grammatical error. But it's ok, I still get what it means though. It was about traveling in style, so they asked me things I would not bring. Kinda difficult to ask, as I always think of what to bring instead. Nice question!

And what other things? THIS!!!

For me Hello Kitty is so damn cute. A bit fat kitty with nice colours, mostly pink, red and blue. It's limited edition Flazz Card. The keychain is included in the purchase. Absolutely crazy about it! Loving it makes me sounded like a spoiled bratz, but I'm very far to such personality in reality. I just love animals, so yeah, Hello Kitty is a cat, right? 

Both photos taken by my cellphone cameras and I don't know what happened to it. Kinda different by quality. Usually it's bright, clear and nice. I've cleaned it and all but nothing good comes back, ugh. No problem, hopefully it can work back good itself. That's how electronic stuff does it, right?

Anyway, I'm in my crisis with my thesis writing project. After spending months abandoning it for the sake of my career, now I'm still facing the fact that time is running out for me to get it on time. I already left my job, but things get stuck on me. Life always is. Brush the blog with my writings soon...

 ...what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Friday, June 22, 2012

Oriental Touch

Took some photos of Sapto Djojokartiko Bride's collection at Bazaar Bridal Week 2012 runway. The show wasn't really nice. The venue was small, messy stage lighting and sloppy catwalk stage. The press pit was awful---small and too close with the stage. The worst was that the show coordinator was kinda rude and less informative to us. Yet, I love this pastel theme bridal gowns.

I never like anything about wedding or bridal stuff. But these weren't like any stupid and old-fashioned wedding thingy. Sapto Djojokartiko's bridal gowns are magic! I'm glad they're not in plain white for showing silly virginal belief. They are in creme pastel which makes them look more endlessly intimate, classy and romantic. The soft material, shanghai collar and embroidery blend perfectly with the peplum cut. But the upper part are slightly similar to last year's spring summer collection by... you know who, right?

...what happens in my bedroom stays in my bedroom...

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Logo? Maybe...


I think I need some kind of logo for this blog. I'm not good at designing, but I finally made this...

It could be put on photos I post here---like a watermark or something like that. And I'm going to make another one, similar to this, for my review blog, which is going to have another name changing. Ugh yeah, I know I'm lame for getting appropriate name or title.

Read and Caffeinated is named so because mostly it's about reading and I love coffee---to read along or to write along. Then, 'caffeinated' it is. But, I found some finds it difficult and inefficient. That means, it's time to get a new name and tagline which are easier to read or write (and to mention orally)...and to remember as well!

*Please do not misuse The Interesting Stranger's logo! The design and concept belong to me and are intended for The Interesting Stranger Project's usage only. I put my trust, hope you respect it. Everything on both of my blogs are copyrighted. Thanks ^^


...what happens in my bedroom stays in my bedroom...

Monday, June 18, 2012

Current Obsession on Cooking with Dulce Delight and Illustrated Bites!

Lately I got sick again. Yes again! My kidney was kinda weak...very week, I can say. Another infection in my whole life. I stayed in my bedroom, lying down, sitting down before my laptop and going back-and-forth to the bathroom. Just in that rhythm for days.

During the stable moments, I browsed the internet about making macaroons---something that has made me alive around these days. And my eyes (together with search engine) landed to these two amazing blogs for cooking!

Firstly, a dazzling pastry making tutorial through an excellent-yet-simple cinematography by Dulce Delight a.k.a. Raiza Costa at Too bad I can't share her home-made video with her yummy foods, but it's going to be more fun if you can click on the link above I posted and watch the video of your fave on the maker's blogspot page.

What I really like from her is that she makes the food, shooting the video herself and becoming the TV host on her own as well. Only with simple kits, she sets the lighting, tripod, camera...also the table set, which I found very attractive, girly and rise my girly mood to shine! It feels so fresh and amused to see every of her video. Raiza Costa, the woman behind all the fantastic blog, is very nice and not overreact. She's being true of herself in very scene in the pastry making. And oh, she's also competing in Masterchef US Season 3! I really hope she makes it.

Raiza is from Brazil, so don't question her accent, but she absolutely tries her best. She studied art in NY by the way, and well, it answers my question of her beautiful and poetic mood of the video she brings.

I want this apron!!! Badly!!! ^^
Another artistically made, last but not least, it's Heather Diane from Illustrated Bites at I'm happy that she makes any cooking self-help and recipe tutorial through great illustrations! It lights up my mood and my brain to digest the information. The art she puts is really my fave. Love (cook + draw) = bravo!

I found her blog through a pin on my pinterest page. Someone I follow pinned one of her artwork about how to chop with chef's nice. I never found a better idea to share this knowledge and I've been never able to find this kind of friendly artistic help. Her art definitely has her own character. Strong, meaningful and cheerful.

Not only, the blog encourages my mood to cook, but to keep everything surrounds me beautiful and full of art. The same thing goes from Raiza's. Heather is also an artist, she has a blog showing her portfolio

Now, those two blogs made me eager to get well soon better, finish all the homeworks and start to cook. But before, I'm going to get myself this sexy and flirty apron that I also found at my pinterest page.

...what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Photoblog - New Rooms, New Atmosphere!

It's been a long time ago actually. The basecamp for News Club is moved to another building. Kinda fresh, yet the Mr Joe's place is not that private anymore. LOL

They got to tidy up the whole former room and found some unused books. The members could take those unused books. You know what? I got a cook book! Feels like Remy...
The overall look once you get in

Fika on the purple couch!

Previous portfolios

Mr. Joe's place

This is it...the cook book!

Feels fresher, yet I don't visit often lately. I'm doing thesis that I'm very lazy working on. Hehe... *grins*

...what happens in my bedroom stays in my bedroom...

Saturday, June 2, 2012


I don't remember whether I have shared this but starting April 6th I left my job as a journalist of the magazine I had been 8 months working for.

Hard decision, but it might be a better choice. I need to get back with my study, which is finalizing my thesis project and to...recover from my sickness. At least, I would do the last thing naturally such as having enough sleep before I'm ready to do my next job better. Yet, there was actually another reason about my leave. Maybe I could write one complete article about it, about the journalism and media publishing life and future in Indonesia.

Some memories I've been through... here they are...

Table-setting photoshoot at Al-Nafoura Le Meridien.
I love the macaroons and the canapes!

Can't skip each moment I can have photograph of me (and Lana)

At ON Five :p Narcissm time!

Editorial team photo for my internship report

Morning faces

...what happens in my bedroom stays in my bedroom...

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Portfolio - Event Photos for MARIE CLAIRE at Kate Spade's Event

This time, I didn't write the article. I only took photos at the event with another photographer from Marie Claire, Audi.

The event was Kate Spade's new store opening at Plaza Senayan. We started at 2pm till 5pm. Both the event and the new store concept are extremely cool and fun. Kate Spade's collection is just simply cute! I love it...

It was in March, but the publication was published on Marie Claire's May 2012 edition.


...what happens in my bedroom stays in my bedroom...

Teachers, You Lied to Me About LGBT!

The title is clear enough I guess. I really mean it.

An idea popped in my head when I started following tweets from Sepoci Kopi about bullying towards lesbians. It is discussed so clear and obvious on how the society mistreats and abuses minority. Especially the LGBTIQs. Within some tweets mentioned that such abuse took place at school. As a former teacher for young (umm, younger) students, somehow it made me think how the 'value' of abusing minority socialized to generations in the simplest way. But today, it reminded me, as well, of how I was taught and informed about LGBTIQ existence.

Before that, I need to make a confession. Scene of kids screamed 'faggot' to others in my early school years wasn't something new. In this opportunity, I'd really like to say sorry, truly sorry, that I was also one...


You might find it funny as today I'm a straight supportive to LGBT people. And how I can be so mad when there's bullying act towards them. Here's the explanation why. We, as kids, were taught that gay/lesbian/transvestites were only... a joke! Details, anyone?

I went to a strict religious school in Jakarta, where the majority of the teachers were Javanese women. Not a way of defense I'm going to give out. But feudalism is the colour of our teacher-student relationship. One-way communication that we couldn't speak up our opinions, except to agreeing. That was the culture we had back then. And we were just born fitting in like that. Just like that. One day, there was a joke from a friend of mine in class, saying that one of the boys was dating with a boy from another class. We were all around 6 or 7 years old at the time. All of us laughed while I was also wondering if that could happen.

Then, my teacher said to us, "well, if it's a boy and a boy... they're just making a joke". I didn't remember how exactly she said it, but she explained more that gay relationship was only a game, and wasn't (and wouldn't be) serious one like a boy and a girl could have. She said that gay stuff like that would only happen to kids like us because we were not mature enough to understand the concept of a real adult relationship. "When you guys grow up, you'll understand better, so there's nothing like that happen in your adulthood," she explained. "C'mon, dating is just for adults, you're still kids!"

On the other hand, it's easy to find a singing transvestites on streets in Jakarta. Yet, that didn't change the fact that we, again as kids, were told differently apart from the truth. A man, wearing woman's clothing. Another teacher in another chance, said, "the man is entertaining you. He wants people to find him funny and amusing, that''s why he wears girly dress." I re-think of it again and all I find is that teacher was actually equalizing transvestites as clowns---wearing 'costume' for fun?

And there's nothing funny with girl's clothes to make fun of!

I know it's the culture everywhere. A man wearing girl's clothes for a prank. It's a patriarchal view if a man is downgrading if he's 'becoming' a woman. Something stodgy, of course, as I believe in gender equality.

Last year, I read one of non-fiction book about Jakarta, Jakarta Inside Out by Daniel Ziv. The author wrote, according to his research for years, "...Jakarta's gay community enjoys a surprising degree of openness and freedom. This is partially because government position on homosexuality is that it doesn't exist." That fact make me realize why my teachers lied to me about LGBT. It's like a slap on my face. They probably hope that we can clear our LGBT tendency or something like that out of our lives, so that we all could be straight?

During grade school years, we had a boy in class, that most of people called him 'the faggot'. One boy with feminine attitude. The teachers weren't that strict to him for how he behaved. But they told us if he could be 'more masculine' when he grew up, sooner or later. In details, the teachers said it's just some kind of 'habit'. I used to call him 'faggot' too. Why? Because I think he's trying to be funny! Not only me, we all did. So, when there was a vote for 'the funniest in class' at the end of each school year, he won! We agreed that he had been funny all the time, you know, he acted like that most of the time.

...and for another silly thing is, knowing that it was a joke, I used to have two girlfriends when I was 7. I thought we were joking, right? A way to have fun, so I did it. So teachers, explain better next time!

So, when did I start to realize that LGBTIQ do really exist? 

I was in grade 7 in a new school. Another almost-the-same-religiously-mad school. Seniority ruled over our school life. Where juniors were so fear of seniors that they could just let the 'older' creatures to do anything they wanted. Or, where a junior deserved to be SOOO proud when a senior came up to her class, bringing flowers and said, 'I like you and I want you to be my girlfriend'. Surprisingly, on one special day, there was a female senior did that to a female junior. Yeah, so you know... That incident made me think. We were not kids anymore and we were already 'legal' to have boyfriends, but why some girls 'still' prefer to have girlfriends. I wondered why. Firstly, I guessed that they probably weren't mature enough. Forgive me, I was 12 and innocent. Too innocent.

When I was 15, it happened to me. A girl who were 7 years older than me....umm, yeah, she liked me too.

The root of not accepting LGBTIQ can be (well, maybe) starting from here. By thinking it's funny, weird, and not exist. They're then just a target to bully. When a religious approach came up, you know it's just going to be worse. If we were educated in the contrary, the views of 1000 students in my school could deliver better changes. In our grade school graduation, one of my friends said, "I wonder what if our faggot boy will be another singing transvestite on streets we could see when we grew up." Daaang! I didn't know why we were so damn stupid.

I worked as a teacher since my second year in university. In that phase, I also joined a community, crowded with LGBT people. For your surprise, I'm happy. And I know better in almost everything directly rather than through the education I got. Unfortunately, I'm happy because I know more great friends, and not because they're acting differently of which I might find as 'funny'. Once a student made a joke about gay people. I explained to him nicely and told him that it's something not nice to do. If he's getting even madly incontrollable, I'll scowl him. Simple.

So, if you think being LGBT is being funny, errr, better try to play creating avatar of yourself, ok?

...what happens in my bedroom stays in my bedroom...

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Chubby With A Chance of LIZZIE PARRA

Here we go!

This is probably the first time I've ever joined a local Indonesian blog giveaway. Well, nothing serious, but it's just very fun to do. The eager feeling and all, you'll just gonna enjoy it!

So, my fellow blogger, known as LIZZIE PARRA, is holding a giveaway. It's Clinique make-up item! She's a kewl make-up artist and I just got a chance to work with her in fashion spread photoshoot of the magazine I'm working for (Pssst... will share her make-up result soon on this blog, after the magz is published in April 2012).

Off you go to....
 MAKE-UP ARTISTRY by LIZZIE PARRA...and enjoy the fun giveaway!

See you there!


(But, sorry, the giveaway only eligible for those who live in Indonesia! So, for those who don't... enjoy looking at this pic. Hopefully, it's enough to kill the jealousy :D
*Image source:

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

22 For A Moment

Yes, they call me by middle name's nick: Marcell.
Well my age isn't 35. Let's say, it's prank!

In fact, I turned 22 this year. For exact, on 9th March yesterday. 13 years apart, the candles and the reality. LOL.

My birthday was opened by the Five For Fighting's song, 100 Years. "I'm 22 for a moment." It fits, for now. At least, that way, I'm reminded of how short and fast life could change and last. It's been 22 years of life...of nothing. I have been nothing! Worth 22 years?

Regarding one last year, it's been tough year. 2011 to early 2012. Ups and downs in life, I can't imagine that it's worse than nightmare's roller coaster. It takes too long for me to leave the playground, I guess. Naivety, religious dogmas, East culture have shaped me bad. I hope too much, I always try to expect less. Yet, I fail. The world is not enough (Just like the James Bond movie title. They kicked it through the title, hmmm).

Such a rebel that found nowhere for a perfect sanctuary. For 22 years, non effectively of course. The previous 365 days of life was so pure of shocking things. I decided to fight back the working system that has exploited me and decided to quit my first job that has given me so much adventures---teaching---giving me space, something for me to try stepping right on my feet. Surprisingly, I miss my kids, I mean my students. What was next to that? I know I'm sick and bankrupt to recover. Even to just now, I passed the moment when I sipped my homemade brewed Hazelnut coffee and kept on writing this blog post.

My fave cover ever since
I was there knew if you read my previous post. I finally got myself into my dream job: a journalist!

What's even funnier? Something bigger tries to dig out a gem inside. A huge phase to get over, as a 21-year-old, I might claim it as a turbulence. Everyday, I face the shakes. More drama comes to my life, in a form of a crook. Yes, he almost tricked me before finally my friends and I found out his previous case. He was a big-mouthed man, who told me that he wanted me to become a great writer and all, something I didn't ask him for. I have given him some opportunities to be in a life he has been wanting for so long, instead of showing what he could do for me and my friends---once again, something we didn't hope for. Thank God, he failed to drag me into his dark business syndicate or to gain more from me and my friends. What's good? I finished the case, after doing an investigation (I'm a journo, remember?), and cut him off from the networking connections. There's no way he could get into the business anymore. Somehow, I still wish that I could send him to upstate.

Sad? I've been losing my friends, though. As I skipped so many times to be with them. But, I met new friends too (the crook included, and  that made him ex-friend). I have more networks, yet it's just felt so lonely, when you're surrounded with stuffs. Don't get me wrong, I love my jobs and my friends. But time is so damn short.

...I have my life, my blessings, my lessons.

No matter how dark it seemed to be, I still could say that I do feel blessed for what I have gained so far.
Within a short moment for me time, I have finally managed to renovate and re-decorate my room. It's still 50 percent done. Yet, my action figures and miniatures have now got the place to be front of my books. So, I have added 3 shelves and one shelf is for some books (which aren't fit any more in my old colourful bookshelf) and the action figures + miniatures and some other cute stuff there. The other two shelves above it are dedicated to my animal stuffs. As they now have more space to breathe, rather than to stuck with the entire animal family I own, just like taking a train to downtown in China. Ok, my stuffed animals aren't that crowded... I made it too much. But yeah, I have less space, regarding the plenty of numbers. I got bigger table to work and nice animals stamps on my wall, girly pin board and sexy Sucker Punch poster on one side of the wall.
Yay! We have a place to show up to you people!

Table. Didn't tidy it up before taking the pic. Sorry....
I tried to calculate the difference of the reality and the 'prank' candles. I'm 22 and the candle is 35. My head is working so slow that day, so it takes a few moment to realize that they got 13 years difference. I wondered how my life when I was 35. It became a sudden reflection, as my life passed by. What might I have reached by the age of 35? I should make a long list plan for it. But 13 years...damn a long time, it seems. But look, I'm 22 years, and it has been gone so fast until I couldn't even be able to track down. So, on the way to 35 of age, 13 years would be even faster to lose.

Full pin board :)

I remember when I was a little, I was so hurried to be grown-up. Now, John Mayer's song "Stop This Train" will be stuck in my head for years ahead (not for whole 13 years, for sure).

New love life is out of my subject last year. After what I had before was damaged thoroughly. I don't know if things could change at my side or the Universe's side about this. Yet, THAT LUCKY BASTARD still need to have his lesson. For now, the only points to go is: finish my school, gain better stability for my financial life, reconnect with friends and my family, quality (me) time, recover, and refresh myself up. With only a few months left in this 2012. Wish me luck! Let my decision and destiny to be breakeven... 

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

My Scrapcards Go Internationally to My Five Amazing Friends

Yeah I know I'm sucks! I lost inspiration to scrapbook in the middle of this kind of...busy times?! Yeaaah... now I'm such a boring girl, living under capitalism slavery. But, I still need to force my head up to push out my creativity into crafting... something like this. 

As you see below, I have made 5 girly handmade cards to friends. I took the pic, a day before I sent them to post office. My decision was... to post the pics, after all of them arrived to the recipients. SOMEHOW, TO MY DEEPEST DISAPPOINTMENT TOWARDS INDONESIAN POST OFFICE SERVICES OR ANYWHERE ELSE, 2 cards DIDN'T ARRIVE UNTIL A MONTH! 
Yes, I sent two cards (to two different people) in Canada, one to US, one to Egypt, and another one to Japan. One card to Canada and the one to Egypt didn't make it. 
And yeah... I'm just speechless. It's manual post service, which using stamps and not special package service where you can track down where the cards go. Can't wait to post it any longer, and... if you find something like's my handmade, specially made for my girl friends.

The one to Egypt, for my friend Neveen. I don't where this card goes now.

To my beautiful and amazing film-maker friend, Kat in Canada.

This one made it. To US, for my friend, talented artist, Kasie.

This one is for my 'bundo', Shila in Canada. I lost this one also. 

This one is sent to Japan for my smart and great hobby photographer, Chloe.

I wish the other lost two could still find their way to the addressees. The cards are signs of how much I miss my friends out there and how much  they are meant to me. I feel so close to five of them in the same portion.

Will write soon...

Saturday, March 3, 2012

Oops! Ahh....

Wanna know how period feels like?

Here we go! Thanks Plankton for the pose.