Wednesday, December 4, 2013


So, if you read my previous post, you'll understand that I'm looking forward to get a new family home. While I'm also thinking to get a new home myself.


Time to recall. I'm 23 years old now, but once I was 18. My favourite age, my turning page. So I bet you all know we can change as a person who grow up into someone who know much better, although not all, just in five years.Once I'm a person who can't say 'no', but it seems lately that it has been my expertise to say what I wanna say, no matter people like it or not. Good, isn't it? I love being honest. But it is sad that some people can't just get it. They think that you change and start to be 'against them'. I'm just being fair as it is.

My views on religion, Indonesia and feminism has affected so many things around me, of course. Some people can't stand to be with me due to my choice and the way I see things. In other words, they just can't let people be happy the way they can, and not through the way most people do.

I can be very blunt in stating my opinions and delivering facts of everything I concern about. Unfortunately, people can't just give it a thought, and choose to unfriend me instead. Being different is hard no matter what. When I knew some of my friends left me because of that, well...I was very disappointed. Who wasn't, anyway?

I was very disappointed to know that even my friends that I care so much are able to treat me as a human being who might be different from them and have rights to choose on the way to live my life and also to speak my own words.

All I know that...whenever the time passes, everything is always getting better or maybe not. But as I got older, I know something's missing, left behind and being forgotten. There are also things got worsened. It's around me.

Yes, it's all around me. Remember my post about giving forgiveness?

Well that person again. Finally I knew something. Something about him, something about us. Never expected that this could happen this way. I believe no matter how close two friends can be, they can always grow apart. Yet, it's different.

It is supposed to be all the act of kindness and togetherness were based for friendship. Yeah, naivety brings me to think if this someone was being good to me because wanting a friend, trying to be best friends with me. The truth is... nope. Neither of those things was his reason.

I knew I trusted the wrong person. My secrets left in him, as well as my disappointment (again). The connection between us were ruined. The next time I met him...he's a stranger. I don't know him anymore. Sometimes, I can't still believe it, coz I felt our friendship was real and now I have to change the way I feel by seeing the real thing ahead my way.

So, thing's changed. Everything is changing and, so is everyone.

Once we can be inseparable, there will be one day strangers we're becoming.

... what happens in my bedroom, stays in my bedroom...

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